Your link to Northwest Indiana. tm
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On-Our-Own
(Being single)
This message is
exclusively for persons on-our-own. You married folk can
go get a cup of coffee. Now then, I have never liked the adjective
"single." It sounds like we not-married are a slice of cheese -
"Kraft's Singles!" Hmpff! The adjectives for "single" in
the Webster
Thesaurus are not any better: "marriageable; unattached;
unmated; unpaired." Yikes! I don't think so. So, until there is another,
I am going with persons "on-our-own." OK?
We on-our-own are indeed, persons just like those "other types." We
are whole and complete in every respect. Yes! Going alone to a couple's
dinner party has issues. Having societal benefits that are not equal are
unfair, and the
piece de resistance - having married friends or
siblings tell us they have the "perfect mate" for us is
disconcerting. But these do not compromise our personhood in any way. We
on-our-own are not destined to a life of hopelessness and misery.
Now, I am all for marriage.
It's very much a part of the life cycle and I, for one,
am open to the possibility. That's because I am open to this Sacred
Covenant - which marriage is, for all the RIGHT reasons. I
am comfortable, enjoy who I am, and grateful to be in
Whose I am. Therefore, I could enjoy being married, and so
could she(???) being married to me. The same is also true of you.
"A successful marriage depends on two things: 1. Finding the right
person and 2.
Being the right person,” reports an unknown source.
There is also a third: Lifting up our faith in God and anchoring our
characteristics and personhood in Him. Doing so, will lead us to find
the person who is to complement those qualities. Of course, some things
we must do on our own: Have financial stability. Manage our affairs
responsibly and enjoy a love for other people; especially children. But,
at the center, is our love for and faith in God. That's the formula, and
here is a reason why:
"Women tend to make a relationship their life; their identity, while men
make it a part of their lives," writes Dr. Laura Schlessinger,
who explains, "The reason a relationship can't provide true self-esteem
for women is the same reason job or accomplishments can't do it for men.
It's idolatry to look to relationships or accomplishments for meaning
and purpose." The self worth of one on-our-own is among the greater
gifts a man or woman can give to a marriage. That would mean if we are
not there yet, getting
married before changing the
modus operandi
about us is a bad idea. The success of one on-our-own
needs to be rooted in how confident the individual, and how firmly
anchored in faith is that person. The success of a marriage needs
to also be rooted in how confident the individual, and how firmly
anchored in faith are the two coupled together.
This Christmas will include the "proposals to marry." For those, I ask
God's blessings on your engagement and offer my congratulations.
Just know that you have the responsibility to first put God at the
center of your life and then, at the center of your relationship.
Seeking out a relationship with God, and being assured of your own and
then two-some self worth, will have God blessing your marriage for
an eternity to come.
May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, so that with one heart and mouth you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God. Joshua 15: 5-7
Dear Heavenly Father - Please give your favor and blessings to my work,
activities and choices. Help me to enjoy who I am, and all that I am.
Please work with me to complement my abilities so that my satisfaction
of them will honor and glorify you. With all that you have made true,
right and unique about me, let me then present myself to a
relationship that serves to complement me and those (the one) you put
before me; puts you at the center, and that brings joy and success to my
relationship(s). Thank you Lord. Please hear my prayer in Jesus name.
Amen.
And now I ask the LORD to bless you and keep you. The LORD to make his
face shine (and smile) upon you and be gracious to you.
The LORD to turn his face towards you - and give you peace.
W.
Dennis Hodges
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